Well, here's an obvious one, right? I mean, consider the source. Anyone that knows me for more than 30 minutes knows that music is essentially like blood to me. I simply need it to stay alive, to feel connected to myself, to the people around me, to the world in which I live. I associate music with colors, events, emotions, movies, history, art, imagery, but most of all with people I've known. It would truly be difficult for me to think of one 'thing' that's ever happened to me that doesn't have music associated with it, and consequently another person or people also associated: literally every chapter of my life has a 'soundtrack' and the soundtrack more than anything else, reminds of the people that were in my life during that time.
I've read before that our sense of smell is the one that can most quickly remind us of a time in our lives or a place we've been to (basically, a memory), but I personally disagree. Don't get me wrong. There are times that I'm walking through a building and will catch a whiff of something and instantly be ten years old again, eating a school lunch or playing with Play-Doh or whatever. Smell can definitely do that and it's always funny when I get that sensation. But the same sensation happens to me every single day when I hear a song. They're ALL associated with something or someone. I tend to be a fairly nostalgic person in general, so I'm sure that's part of why I do have such strong memories associated with different pieces of music.
What I've started to notice is that there's a specific order to it. That is, I can't think of every event in my life and name five songs, or even one, that remind me of that time. It always happens in reverse. So, I'll hear a song and instantly think "Yep, that was when _______ happened." There are times in our lives that a song comes on at just the right moment to amplify whatever we're thinking or feeling at that time. And I think we're all cognizant of it. Whether we realize it or not, the music is indeed moving us. Sometimes, it pushes you over the edge to tears if you're feeling sad. Sometimes, it makes you scream at the top of your lungs, singing every word and getting a physical and emotional liberation just from the act of doing so. Sometimes, I just smile or laugh out loud when I hear music that reminds of something goofy that happened while the song played in the background. Other times, the song is just a snapshot of that time in my life. Not necessarily associated with just one event or person, but a song that has simply become part of the soundtrack of that period in your life.
The power of all of this, for me, is that it can make me reach out to those people and share the moment with them. There are more people that I've lost touch with than I care to remind myself of. But for the most part, the people that are important or have been important to me are still in my life, even if some are only in a small way now. But they're still there. And that's what matters. So when I hear 'that song' and those moments happen, I am able to reach out and remind them of a story, remind them of the song, relive it for just a brief moment with them. And I think that brings me closer to that person. Relationships are based on lots of 'stuff', but shared experiences are (obviously) one of the bigger components in developing an interpersonal connection with someone. And when a song can spur a memory, which spurs a call/text/email to that friend (old or new), which spurs the sharing of the memory, which spurs them to share THEIR recollection of it (Because they always remember some detail you've forgotten. Indeed, that's the point. Everyone remembers what was most relevant to THEM.), which spurs you to share a laugh with that person again... well, you get the picture by now. It literally brings you closer together, deepens the importance of that memory, that song, even if it was something totally trivial at the time. And despite the pressure we feel to make money, to win, to succeed, be something or somebody... I mean, really... none of that crap matters. Your friends and family matter. That's it. At least for me it is.
When you're in your last moments on this earth, I seriously doubt you think of the cars you drove or the trophies you won or the amount of money you had. I'd like to hope that we all turn the lights out for the last time thinking of the people that were most important to us in our lives. The people we shared our lives with, who inspired us, kept us grounded, made us fly, made us laugh, made us cry (no rhyme intended, it just happened)...
I would like to think that at least a few people will remember me, not only in the end, but on a regular basis. That they'll look back at whatever relationship we've had and say "Yeah, that was pretty cool..." And if my personal belief is that music helps me remember them and sharing the music helps them remember me, I suppose in a way, I feel like I've worked myself into their subconscious a little more and enhanced my connection with them. That's not really motivated by narcissism though. It may seem that way on the surface, but for me it's motivated more by a desire to have that deeper connection with the people who come in and out of my life.
What's my point? Shit, I don't know. I guess if you're reading this, it's likely that you're a friend. You're someone that I've got some stories about, and someone that certain songs remind me of. So that means you're in my thoughts, maybe more than you realize. And that can't be a bad thing, can it? That someone you do or did call a friend still thinks about you from time to time, still remembers at least one thing you did together that was worthwhile or memorable. I think you can have an individual memory on its own, but for me, music is the key that unlocks it and lets it come out again. And to me, that's important, and powerful. Hence, the title of this blog...
What about you? If you feel so inclined, even if no one else who reads this knows the other person you're talking about, leave a comment that details a song or two that remind you of someone from your past or current life. See if leaving that comment may inspire you to actually call or email that person (if you can) and share the moment with them again. And see if you might agree with what I said above about the power of doing so.
Since it's my blog, I suppose I should go first. In the interest of fairness, I'm simply going to hit 'random' on my iTunes and the first few songs that come up, I'll name the song and the person/people/event I most strongly associate the tune with. Hell, maybe I'll end up giving them a call... Here we go...
Photograph - Def Leppard: Ha, great start... Totally reminds me of my brother, who was the first one to turn me onto Def Leppard. I remember him watching the video for this song and saying how cool Joe Elliott was because he had handcuffs on his pants. Seriously, that's what he said. I also could swear that he wanted to buy a sleeveless Union Jack shirt after that.
Corduroy - Pearl Jam: Literally have heard this song hundreds of times, but I most often think about one particular day working at Second City Grill in Raleigh in 1994, my buddy Kevin Cline and I in the back doing prep work (cutting vegetables), listening to the radio station in Raleigh that was playing the whole Vitalogy record on the air a few days before it was released. As I remember it, we both thought this was the best track on the record. I would still tend to agree with that, although Immortality is another favorite of mine. But I digress...
Wings of the Storm - Whitesnake: Tiffany Tate, a full-time friend and part-time girlfriend back in middle school. She got me this CD for my birthday. I cannot hear any of the cuts on this record without thinking about her for at least a split second or two. Then I usually go into a nice bout of air drumming or tapping along on my steering wheel.
Songbird - Oasis: Scot Leith, good friend, equally as passionate about music as I am. Any time I hear Oasis, I think of Scot, who is the biggest Oasis fan I know. And I still shake my head at the fact that he has tried to convince me that their debut album was a better debut than Appetite for Destruction. Quick, who can actually name the title of Oasis' debut album? And conversely, who even needs me to say the band responsible for Appetite? I rest my case, Scottie...
Centerfield - John Fogerty: every single one of my high school baseball teammates (Chism, Casey, Nall, Alden, Rummel, Cody, Conti, Lawton, all of them...), showing up for weekend practices when we were pushing deep into the playoffs during my junior year in high school. Coach Boyd used to let us play music during the weekend practices, which were basically nothing more than extended batting sessions. This was on the approved song list and it would play multiple times in each practice. One day, I got into the press box and put a Dangerous Toys CD on, but Coach Boyd quickly put the kibosh on that. I can't remember if he made me run because of it...
One - Metallica: Chad Bradley, my buddy Tyson's older brother. I have no idea what caused him to do this, but one day during freshman year in high school, we're at Tyson's place and Chad went into this hilarious five-minute crazy fit on the stairs. He was just saying all kinds of stuff, yelling and making random noises and trying to make Tyson and I laugh, which we were. Right in the middle of it, Chad starts going "Darkness! Imprisoning me! All that I see! Uh! Uh! Uh!" Although Metallica in no way intended this song to be humorous, I still chuckle each time I hear it, just because of Chad's lunacy.
God Bless The Children of the Beast - Motley Crue: Cynthia Moreci. One of the biggest Motley fans I know and despite the fact that I loved post-Girls Girls Girls Crue, I never was as into their earlier stuff until she loaned me the remastered CDs when they got released 3-4 years ago and I was able to burn them onto my hard drive. Our love of the Crue and of music in general is definitely one of the main things that caused Cynthia and me to become as close as we are.
Anyone else care to share??? Just put something on and see if it sparks a memory...
Rock on,
Cru
